THE ONTARIO LAWYERS’ ASSISTANCE PROGRAM

Stress Management Tips for Lawyers

By: Leota Embleton, Program Manager, Ontario Bar Assistance Program

The holiday season can be a time of stress for many reasons.  Here are some tips for keeping it all in perspective.  Lawyers have very busy schedules at all times of the year and the additional pressures of holiday events and expectations can be very overwhelming.

Dealing with family. Be realistic. Families are very important and can also be demanding.   If there are bad feelings about someone try not to make an issue of it but don’t pretend that all is well.  Set limits that you are comfortable with when it comes to family events.    

Financial Pressures.  Know your spending limit.  If you are feeling financial pressures try to buy smaller gifts that reflect the person’s interest rather than trendy expensive gifts.  You can show caring by getting something that you know is meaningful and personal but not necessarily expensive.

Time Pressures.  People shouldn’t have to put lives on pause or rearrange schedules because of the holidays.  Remember to stay tuned in to who you are and not try to keep up with schedules or expectations of others.

Health issues. If you or someone you are close to is ill it may be harder to feel happy.  Take time to value time together and acknowledge pain or sadness.  It can make everyone feel better to acknowledge illness and not try to pretend that everything is normal.

Dealing with recent family tragedy, death or marriage/relationship break up.  Sometimes people may be grieving a personal situation or loss.  Let them know that you care but give them the choice about involvement in activities.  If you are in a pressured situation try to articulate what you need from those around you—let people know what you need.

Coping strategies.  Keep your expectations realistic and use discretion in what you do. You are not expected to attend every office or family event.  Learn to say “no” to invitations and parties that overwhelm you or you don’t have time for.

Dealing with those with different expectations.   People have individual experiences that are different than the idealized view of the season.  Let others experience the holidays in their own way, but offer to share your happiness with someone who might be lonely.  Don’t try to do what you are not comfortable with.

If you experience ongoing stress, overwhelming sadness, or distress, remember that confidential help is available for lawyers and their families.

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